Thursday, September 10, 2009

Real Life

It would seem real life these days has taken a backseat to a more politically correct, tip-toe on eggshells type of life style. While the average American works hard and scrapes by just to have one more bill or tax thrown at them, the Government and television makes us believe it is all ok. From movies that always have a happy ending, weather it's zombies or knocking up the one-night stand, or the President telling his people we are winning a war that can not be won, all of the real problems are put on the back burner to simmer and eventually boil over.

We live in a country founded on free speech, yet at every winding turn people are criticized and punished for speaking their minds. Our country has become a place where we believe we have the right to seek financial gain because someone has offended us. When did this happen? No where in the constitution does it say we as people have the right to not be offended. So, because Don Imus called a female basket ball team "nappy headed ho's" he loses his job and is able to be sued for defamation of character? Give me a break. The student that originally intended to sue stated her reputation was ruined; she was being viewed as a prostitute, and laughed at by her piers. How would this comment from someone who has never before met her ruin her reputation or make someone view her as a prostitute? The only thing that can ruin her reputation is her own actions.

I think it's time we start taking responsibility for our selves in this country. After all, words are just that, only words. The thing that gives them power is the people that listen to them and then put up the big top for the media circus they have now created.
While we're out loosing out minds in the street over the entire "he said she said" our children are becoming more disrespectful and lawless. Now, when a child walks into a class room and mows down his classmates because they made fun of him in gym, we have a real problem. But wait, the parents had no idea their child had problems, and it must be the fault of music, movies, and video games. Oh, and let me remind you, the same parents who blame the video games and movies are the same parents who purchased them.

Parents also wonder why they receive no respect from their children. There are three very good reasons. One, parents do not interact with their children and involve themselves in their lives. Two, parents are no longer able to discipline their children. Three, some parents are children themselves, giving birth at age 15, 16, and 17, having no idea how to raise a child, as they probably have not been properly raised themselves.

We have been forced into a world where we negotiate with a 3 year old about bed time and are forced to bribe our children for obedience and respect. The world has evolved into a system of people who pass judgment without knowing what happened. If I am in the super market and my 3 year old talks back and swears at me, believe this, I will slap him on the mouth. This mere tap on the lips is a far cry from child abuse, but it is enough to let him know who's in charge and that I mean business. Now if I were to yank the child out of the grocery cart and perform a WWF wrestling move on him, power bombing him, and then demanding a clean up on isle 4, by all means call the authorities. But in the first example, what gives you the right to judge how I disciple my child? After all the talking and explaining, sometimes a child needs to be spanked. A spanking gives a very clear message. This message is, you were warned and play time is now over.

I will always remember a story my Grandpa told me when I was a boy growing up in Georgia. There was an older woman who called the police on her son. When the police arrived they asked the woman what the problem was. She simply stated that her son had been misbehaving at school and sassing her. She told the police he was too big for her to hold down so she could whoop him and this is why she needed their assistance. The police proceeded to hold the boy down while his mother gave him a spanking. Some folks today will hear this and be appalled, but why? There was no long term physical harm done to the boy. If anything, he was embarrassed, and what's wrong with that? The boy should be embarrassed by his actions. This, I promise you, taught the boy a good lesson. You may ask what that lesson was, and the lesson my friends is, you're never too big for a spanking or too big to respect for your mother.

We have gotten away from the discipline of our parents' day by worrying that our children will be traumatized and scarred for life due to embarrassment and lack of self-esteem. At the same time, this is why we put into practice the "no child left behind" idea. Can anyone tell me how this actually benefits children? I am prepared to hear the normal jibber jabber of how children will have better self -esteem and the other kids won't make fun of them. This may be true for the moment, but what about when children become adults? How can children benefit when they are walked through life never being disappointed or embarrassed? This carries so many negative side affects, and yet we all think it's such a great idea.

So now, the first time little Johnny applies for a job and is turned down due to his lack of skills, who suffers? That's right, little Johnny does, but at least he didn't get held back a year in school, right. You may ask how is little Johnny suffering and I'll tell you. Little Johnny has no idea how to handle disappointment and his self-esteem that you were so proud of when he was six in now in the crapper because he's finally been told he's not good enough for something. Also little Johnny probably has no idea how to gain the skills necessary for the job in which he applied. He will more than likely run to mommy and daddy and ask for help. Little Johnny can do nothing on his own. When we let kids fail or not be as good as others, it builds character. It teaches them if you want something you have to work for it, and it won't always be easy.

That brings me to a pet peeve of mine. This takes us into the children's sports world. Now most of us have grown up playing and loving sports from baseball to football, and yes, even soccer. Most leagues play a season and at the end there are the play-offs to decide the champs and who gets that ever so coveted trophy. When your team comes in last place you shouldn't get a trophy. This builds a false sense of accomplishment. The children on that losing team should want that trophy and be encouraged to try harder next year to earn it. When we are forced to work for the things we want in life we are more proud when we finally get it. We may not always get what we want and this teaches us how to appreciate the thing we do have.

In a country full of consumers the amount of things we waste is ridiculous. Most people today don't earn the things they have, they have been given them. They ride on the government dole or mommy and daddy's coat tails. We as parents need to stop this. Think back to the time when we were kids. We went through hard times of disappointment and embarrassment and we are still standing. We didn't worry if someone was offended by our opinion, it was our opinion, and we stood-up for what we believed. Our parents took part in our lives and we didn't take a weapon from Uncle Joe's arsenal and play war at school with live rounds.

For the sake of real life we need to revert back to our country's original values and morals before we are overrun with adults who have no skills, massive entitlement issues, and lawyers armed with class actions suits.

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